A Mission Update

Well first of all, Ben and Sarah are married! A month later, we had two receptions to host in Omaha and the above picture was my sister and I as bridesmaids with some good friends from Germany! All the occasions were lovely but hectic and now that they're done, it's my turn to slightly panic as my mission is 22 days away!

Now, I realize I haven't posted much of my actual mission preparation but there is a lot that isn't physical that has to be done (if that makes any sense.) As far as clothing, luggage, hygiene products, etc. I think I mostly have what I need. Some items are last minute things I need to get or things I can buy cheaper at the MTC or on my mission. At the same time, after trying on most of my clothes I currently own, I think I have a relatively color-coordinated wardrobe to bring but there is a mixture of mission clothes and clothes I have to wear in the meantime that is making it difficult to really officially pack anything yet. I've also realized I have a lot of clothes that either don't fit me, don't work with garments or I just won't be wearing anymore. I don't want to give it all away to goodwill either because there are some nice things in there! I suppose I can figure out what to do in 22 days. That day is quite stuck in my head if you didn't notice.

Aside from the material things that I'll need to get through the next 18 months of my life, there are many spiritual preparations that one must go through before leaving for the MTC. I had set a goal for myself to read the whole Book of Mormon cover to cover before then as well as starting the other books that are allowed on missions. I try to stick to a mission schedule including when scripture study times are but it's very easy to slip into the "worldly" ways of college-kid sleep schedules and laziness. I am trying to at least walk more every day!

My biggest struggle has been with doubt. During the few quite moments at work or before I fall asleep at night, thoughts butt into my head about how hard it will be to walk so much every day, to talk to random strangers, to have doors slammed in my face or to have past medical problems affect my mood and strength again. I understand that most of these thoughts are Satan trying to scare me and stop me from going. I know with all my heart that going on this mission is the right thing to do but it is hard to fight your own mind. Being at home for the last 9 months hasn't helped much either. It's been a constant struggle trying to find the balance between daughter/sister/teenager-at-home and independent/woman/college-student. There are many times I feel alone in my personal struggle and I often forget that there is always my Savior, Heavenly Father and Holy Spirit waiting to listen to my problems and comfort me. It is a fight every day to focus on my mission ahead and make myself mentally, physically, emotionally and especially spiritually ready, but a fight that must be fought constantly because Satan tries hardest to take us down when we are doing our best.

Now that I've got that all out, I'll mention that I am giving a farewell talk in the Rockbrook Ward this coming Sunday and I have almost no idea what to say. I have a topic and everything but I know I am not a strong speaker when it comes to needing to fill 20 minutes with spiritual insight. I'll likely get side-tracked with personal stories and not even make it 10 minutes (like last time I gave a talk :p). I also have my flight itinerary already and will be flying out the morning of October 9th. I have already given my blog account information to my brother Matt and have asked him to share parts of emails I send home on here so anyone actually reading this can stay updated that way. For now, signing off!